Bill Belichick's Balls

Is anybody really surprised that Bill Belichick has deflated balls?

And Because I Can't Help Myself More Ball Jokes

I've always said Bill Belichick has a set of balls on him -- that are squishy and underinflated.

Tom Brady likes his balls scuffed up and soft, so he can get a good grip on them.

Before each game, Bill Belichick submits his balls for inspection.  Officials check the pressure of Bill's balls and weigh each one individually to assure that they meet with NFL regulations.

ESPN is reporting that Roger Goodell is heading to Atlantic City where he'll burn Bill Belichick's balls in an elevator.

Bill Belichick Press Conference About His Balls (courtesy of my brother)

Bill Belichick: My balls are inflated to the pressure that's best for the team.  Next question?

Bill Belichick: My balls have the same inflation they always have, and they treated last game like any other game.

Bill Belichick: My balls need to execute better in all phases of the game.

Bill Belichick: My balls are moving on to Seattle, who's a great team, in all phases of the game, and they are tough, physical and know how to execute.

Bill Belichick: My balls are neither over or under inflated.  They are sagging, in all phases of the game, and they need to execute better.

Bill Belichick: My balls, like in every game, are examined by the referees, who are just doing their job, every game, and I think they try to do their job in every phase of the game, and execute.

Bill Belichick: My balls are something you should ask the NFL about.  I'm focusing on my team, and getting them ready for the next game.

Bill Belichick: My balls on film tend to favor the a-gap, and that's something they've been working on, but we need better execution.

Bill Belichick: My balls were drafted in the late second round, with one of two picks we traded down for, which represents ball value, not deflation.

Bill Belichick: My ball status is something for the trainers and medical staff and I'll wait to see what they say about them and then we'll do what's best for the team.

Bill Belichick: My balls are nothing new, and they've been handled like this since the 60's, and Lombardi handled them the same way, then there was the spread offense, and of course Joe Paterno knew something about ball-handling and it's evolved, so my balls are nothing new.

Bill Belichick: My balls were walk-ons at Rutgers.