Tuesday, June 23, 2015

This Week's Rejected Daily Mail Comments -- 6/23/15

Another Post Courtesy of the The Daily Mail - I kid Rupert Murdoch a lot when we see each other at the Friar's Club but his rag does supply an endless assortment of crap for my blog.

When you really, really need to see celebrity nipples poking through skintight blouses there is only one place to go on the web, the The Daily Mail. Now there's another reason to visit The Daily Mail, a new game for killing time at work. The goal is to get as many red down arrows as possible when you comment on their articles.

You'd think it would be easy. The Daily Mail is just like the New York Post except it's targeted at toothless limeys instead of toothless guys from Staten Island. Work some pro-ObamaCare into your comment, maybe a gay marriage doesn't really hurt anyone, and those red arrows will start piling up, right?  Right?  Wrong. The problem is you have to get your comments through those warehouses full of censors housed somewhere just east of Mumbai.

Rejected Comments of the Past Week

Khloe Kardashian blonde
Khloe Kardashian sports a voluminous platinum blonde 80s-inspired perm
My Comment:  Khloe looks just like the Kowardly Lion if the Kowardly Lion was fat and used up.

Cowardly lion Khloe Kardashian funny

That's an old photo of the Cowardly Lion wearing a dress that's three sizes too small at Pure in Caesar's Palace back in 1938.  Maybe OJ isn't Khloe's father.  Maybe her father is Bert Lahr.  I can't imagine Bert slumming it with Kris Jenner but he was known to have a drink or two.

Lindsey Graham wife funny
White House hopeful Lindsey Graham explains why he never married in tell-all memoir: 'I haven't been lucky that way' 
My Comment:   This guy is so deep in the closet, he's living in Narnia.

That's presidential hopeful Lindsey Graham with a potential First Lady/Wife.  I thought I wrote this Narnia line but after googling it, I probably overheard it at Rawhide when I lived in Chelsea.  Props to op.

Kylie Jenner underwear
Kylie Jenner models her 'boyfriend' Tyga's Crisp-brand boxer briefs
My Comment:  Kylie's getting close.  On her 18th birthday, she'll post a selfie with Tyga's johnson in her mouth and then she'll finally be as famous as big sister Kim.  I'm sure her mom can't wait.

Boating Bad! Amazing dead ringer for Breaking Bad's Walter White was coxswain in charge of 1920s Rhyl lifeboat 
My Comment:  Given that Walter White was an orphan, that must be his grandfather.  Journalism is not dead!

Tamara Ecclestone breast feeding oops
Tamara Ecclestone posts intimate picture of herself breast-feeding daughter Sophia in hotel swimming pool 
My Comment: I stayed at a hotel in the Bahamas with a swim up bar.  This is way better.

Accepted Comments

Sometimes I do get a comment through the censors. Remember my goal is to get as many red arrows as possible.

Bristol Palin porn star
Bristol Palin SLAMS Miley Cyrus for being a hypocrite and anti-Christian in confused blog rant 
My Comment:  There are a lot of churches in the US. Bristol Plain should find one that doesn't preach hate.  Rating ▲27

Bristol Palin Miley Cyrus good Christian

Bristol Palin Miley Cyrus good Christian

Bristol Palin hot ass

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