Big Time Producer: To hell with it. Give me her ass!
Big Time Producer: I want Sandra Bullock's ass right in my face. I want painted on white pants, I want ass crack, butt camel toe, whatever you kids call it, I want an ass that looks so tasty that all of America wants to eat it for Thanksgiving!!!
Marketing Guy: Yes, Sir!
Big Time Producer: And tell the art department geeks to take 3 inchs off her waist. That'll make that ass pop!
Marketing Guy: Great idea, Sir. What should we do with the black guy? Make him really small and have the yard markers point from his distant silhouette directly at Sandra Bullock's ass?
Big Time Producer: Nah, put his big fat ass right next to Sandra's delicious little ass. Black/white. Yin/yang. Beautful/ugly. It's feng shui, baby!!!
So, will I go to the movie theater to see Sandra Bullock's ass and another uplifting "What Would a Poor Black Person do Without a Kindly-Hearted White Person" biopic? No. While I would love to be able to ease my liberal guilt by spending $12 and 2 hours watching another "White People as Savior" flick and I'm obviously fascinated with Sandra Bullock's ass, I'm broke and I already have the newspaper ad of Sandra's ass. Thank you, Big Time Producer.