BUENOS AIRES, Argentina — A 38-year-old former Miss Argentina has died from complications after undergoing cosmetic surgery on her buttocks.
Solange Magnano, a mother of twins who won the crown in 1994, died of a pulmonary embolism Sunday after three days in critical condition following a gluteoplasty in Buenos Aires.
"Mr. Magnano? About your wife, there's good news and bad news. First the good news, your wife's ass looks terrific! Now the bad news, she's never going to use it again and neither are you."
Feel free to bombard me with buttock puns, gluteoplasty euphemisms and hate e-mails.
From my brother, Dave:
I once tricked a girl into a little "cosmetic surgery" on her buttocks. She didn't die, but she couldn't sit down for a week.
Miss Argentina?! Of course I do, that country's got quality ass. Unfortunately, the quality of their ass surgeons? Not so good.
Sphincter?! Hell, it killed her!
If only the embolism had gone to her brain, it wouldn't have done any damage!