Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Stories I'd Like to See in 2011 - Part 1: Sarah Palin

2010 was a great year for comedy. The Palin brood, especially the bitches, were even more fun than Mama Pitbull. Brett Favre exposes himself all over the place, first showing off his massive ego, then giving us a glimpse of his meager penis. Can 2011 possibly live up to last year?

I think so. Here are my predictions for 2011.

Dick Cheney Accidentally Shoots Sarah Palin in the Face

After watching Sarah Palin take 16 shots to down a caribou that was chained to a stake, former Vice President Dick Cheney realizes that Sarah is his kind of hunter. He invites her to hunt with him at a private club in Dutchess County, New York. You remember the place. They keep the pheasants so fat they can barely stand, they clip their wings and then they put them in cages so that the executive hunters don't have to work too hard to get their kills.

Sarah shows up straight from a Fifth Avenue manicure with her nails still wet, a grumpy Dick Cheney has a few too many glasses of scotch while waiting, and then the former Vice President shoots Sarah Palin in the face, accidentally.

dick cheney shoots sarah palin in face accidentally, funny photo
Will a horribly scarred and deformed Sarah be a more desirable candidate in 2012 or will a turned-off country look elsewhere for their masterbatory fantasies? Will Sarah have her bandages removed live on TV on Bravo, Spike or Fox News? Will an emotionally distraut Todd hook up with Christine O'Donnell and Lindsay Lohan, fail to rise to the occasion, but still send the video to his good buddy Joe the Plumber who will immediately sell it to deadspin.com for $27 and a carton of Lucky Strikes? We can only hope.

BTW, that's the second biggest flag pin I've ever seen.


  1. Bobby,

    That's the second biggest flag pin you've ever seen? Where have you been, boy?

    Michele Bachmann needs a handtruck for her pin. Of course, she does keep a young Princeton grad on staff to help lift it.


  2. Bill,

    Thanks for the comment. I knew you would like this bit.

    Sarah Palin -- that is the 7th biggest flag pin and the 2nd biggest cankles I've ever seen!

    and don't tell me about Bill and Hillary.

    and it only works with 2nd because of Mel Brooks.


  3. I was so cruel but I I think the man who shot against Sarah is not guilty, actually the police should investigate this case deeper.