Thursday, February 20, 2014

This Week's Rejected Daily Mail Comments -- 2/20/14

Another Post Courtesy of the Daily Mail - I kid Rupert Murdoch a lot when we see each other at the Friar's Club but his rag does supply an endless assortment of crap for my blog.

When you really, really need to see celebrity nipples poking through skintight blouses there is only one place to go on the web, the Daily Mail Online. Now there's another reason to visit The Daily Mail, a new game for killing time at work. The goal is to get as many red down arrows as possible when you comment on their articles.

You'd think it would be easy. The Daily Mail is just like the New York Post except it's targeted at toothless limeys instead of toothless guys from Staten Island. Work some pro-ObamaCare into your comment, maybe a gay marriage doesn't really hurt anyone, and those red arrows will start piling up, right?  Right?  Wrong. The problem is you have to get your comments through those warehouses full of censors housed somewhere just east of Mumbai.

Rejected Comments of the Past Week

Michael Sam's father was shocked but proud
My Comment:  Michael Sam "could become the first openly sexual homosexual NRL player."   What the heck does this mean?  Will he be performing sexual acts during rugby games?

rugby looks gay

I can understand the Daily Mail's confusion.  Sometimes rugby looks like the only sport where everybody wants to be on the bottom of the pile.

Chris Christie lap-band surgery failure funny
Chris Christie's lap-band surgery branded a 'success'
My Comment: Now he can fit into a XXXL pair of pants and a prison cell.

Ray Rice video funny
Shocking video shows Baltimore Ravens star Ray Rice 'dragging his unconscious girlfriend out of an Atlantic City casino elevator'
My Comment:   In the NFL, it's just another 3 yard carry for Ray Rice.  Nothing will happen to him.  Two of his teammates have already been found guilty of domestic abuse.  It's all good in the NFL, unless you're gay.

Accepted Comments

Sometimes I do get a comment through the censors. Remember my goal is to get as many red arrows as possible.

Bruce Jenner dressed as woman funny
The mane attraction: Bruce Jenner, 64, debuts thick, volumnised bouffant just hours after showing off new daring dip-dye
My Comment:  It's nice to see Bruce getting in touch with his feminine side. More men should embrace it!    Rating ▼1

Shaun White Bruce Jenner dating funny

A pair of losers with no balls, Shaun White and Bruce Jenner.  Bruce may be getting in touch with his inner White.

Khloe Kardashian camel toe or wrinkled crotch funny
All puffed out? Khloe Kardashian spotted smoking on the dance floor before exiting club with The Game looking worse for wear
My Comment:   Khloe looking worse for wear? That girl gets worn more often than a pair of rented bowling shoes. A spray of deodorant then who's next? Lamar deserves better!    Rating ▲20

Matt LeBlanc fat funny
It's a time warp: Matt LeBlanc continues his turn into a silver fox while Kevin Spacey doesn't seem to have aged a day
My Comment:   Silver fox? More like a silver refrigerator box. Matt looks like an extra from an old Sopranos episode.  Rating ▼3

Kim Kardashian before after butt implants funny
Has Kim had fat injected into her bottom? Kardashian's increasingly shapely rear sparks rumours of a surgical boost
My Comment:  If you look at her photos it's obvious that Kim has had fat injected into her bottom the old-fashioned way, by eating too much. The girl is FATTER than she was 6 years ago! Rating ▲3

Kim Kardashian butt implant xray shows nothing

Kim Kardashian - "The doctors x-rayed my head and found nothing."

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