Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Jayson WIlliams Hits a Tree, with his SUV, in Manhattan. And Susanna Hoffs Looking Incredibly Hot

Another Post Courtesy of the New York Post - I kid Rupert Murdoch a lot when we see each other at the Friar's Club but his rag does supply an endless assortment of crap for my blog.


Former NBA player Jayson Williams is facing DWI charges after smashing his SUV into a tree in an early morning East Side crash.

Shocking. Not that Jayson Williams was driving drunk in Manhattan but that he managed to hit a tree!

The tree he hit was at 18th Street and Avenue C. I lived for many years only a few blocks away from that location. I am intimately familiar with those beautiful trees.

Let's take a moment of silence for that poor tree. Can you imagine being a majestic oak trying to grow out of a sidewalk on Avenue C? You've survived decades of steady mulching with empty crack vials and spent cigarette butts from passers-by. You've toiled for decades while your roots search for scant nutrients amongest the underground maze of subways, sewer lines, and pre-revolutionary negro burial grounds. Your delicate leaves have received a daily dose of electromagnetic radiation from the East 14th Con Edison Power Station that is so high it would give George Hamilton a melanoma.

Then frickin' Jayson Williams slams his big-ass SUV into your ass.

Let's take a moment of silence for Jayson Williams. Does anybody remember the funny, non-threatening, Sinbad-like Williams that was a star at Christ the King, St. Johns, the Nets and the David Letterman Show!?!

A big thanks to The Yankee Princess for that photo of Jayson Williams.

What's hotter a gorgeous chick talking about sports or a gorgeous chick playing an electric guitar? Please discuss. That photo of Susanna Hoffs is probably not fair but I'm pretty sure that the Yankee Princess would not give me, an infamous Yankee hater, a similar photo to use.


  1. Bob,

    Happy 2010 from Down Under!!!

    Nice post. Although you missed an opportunity to use that most allegorical of words, allegedly!

    Question: What's hotter? A gorgeous chick up in NYC or a gorgeous chick in hell?

    Answer: Trick question. I haven't seen any gorgeous chicks down here. Although, any female down here is, by definition, hot.


  2. Hey Bill,

    Didn't you once say that its:

    "Better to be a jerk with bad knees than a bad jerk that slams trees"