Wednesday, April 7, 2010

The Last Staff Meeting

Actual page from my notebook with notes from staff meetings on 11/12/08 and 12/3/08.

The first meeting we were forced to use the new video conferencing equipment because it cost something like $100,000. It consists of two 48 inch screens. On one screen you see the poor saps that do exactly what you do only better, about 100 miles away. On the other screen, you see yourselves.

We looked terrible.

They also arranged the conference room especially for us and lined us up so we could all be seen. I felt inspired so instead of writing useless notes I drew a useless picture. It ain't DaVinci, but it ain't bad. Frank, the network guy, got the pimp spot, the halo, and got called My Personal Savior for a week after the meeting. Tony, the guy second from the left, fell asleep and looked so pale on the monitor that I thought he died. I yelled, "Hey Tony, are you dead!?!" which woke him up and got a laugh.

I really should be writing for The Office.

Okay, that was the promised whimsy, here are the marigolds.

Ready for more halfassed DaVinci? Believe it or not, I have pissed the Mona Lisa (that's another DaVinci painting).


  1. Bobby,

    I don't remember wine being served at NY Times staff meetings. Where do you work again?

    Your total disregard for authority and your slovenly and incomplete note taking are symptomatic of the roller coaster decline of theh American corporation.

    Which one of those pathetic scrawls is supposed to be you?


  2. Dear Bob,

    You are an extremely talented masturbater, I mean painter. But you may have missed a critical image on your drawing/painting. The penis. Where is the staff member sporting a penis head. Get back to me on this one.


    P.s. Marigolds smell funny. Get back to me on this one too.

  3. Bill,

    Thanks for the comment!

    No wine, no heavy tablecloth, no matzoh or bitter herbs -- except for Herb the old COBOL programmer. He's bitterer than any slave under Pharaoh.

    No me up there. Like I'm going to draw an unsympathetic likeness of myself!

    Why do you read my blog, you roasting remains of a rhinorrheatic rightwinger?


  4. WannaBe,

    We are required to wear clothes at work. This is a good rule. Reduces the vomiting.

    Marigolds are good for keeping insects off the tomatoes. You may be a bug. Are you encased in chitin?

    Thanks for the comment!


  5. Bobby,

    Rhinorrheatic rightwinger? I like it, you lackadaisical lump of leftist lymph leakings.


  6. Okay well what liked of this article was the marigolds because I love those flowers, actually I have a lot of those flowers at my garden you have to see what a beautiful it is.