Friday, June 20, 2014

This Week's Rejected Daily Mail Comments -- 6/20/14

Another Post Courtesy of the The Daily Mail - I kid Rupert Murdoch a lot when we see each other at the Friar's Club but his rag does supply an endless assortment of crap for my blog.

When you really, really need to see celebrity nipples poking through skintight blouses there is only one place to go on the web, the The Daily Mail. Now there's another reason to visit The Daily Mail, a new game for killing time at work. The goal is to get as many red down arrows as possible when you comment on their articles.

You'd think it would be easy. The Daily Mail is just like the New York Post except it's targeted at toothless limeys instead of toothless guys from Staten Island. Work some pro-ObamaCare into your comment, maybe a gay marriage doesn't really hurt anyone, and those red arrows will start piling up, right?  Right?  Wrong. The problem is you have to get your comments through those warehouses full of censors housed somewhere just east of Mumbai.

Rejected Comments of the Past Week

Kim Kardashian shows off her pole dancing skills
My Comment:  That pole could hold up the Golden Gate Bridge!  BTW, I wouldn't touch Kim Kardashian with a 10-foot pole and I wouldn't touch that pole.  It must smell like Liverpool at low tide.

Heaven is full  of murderers and rapists
'I'm going home to be with Jesus': Last words of killer who raped and murdered 15-year-old as he becomes the first US execution since botched lethal injection
My Comment:   More evidence that Jesus has worse taste in men than Taylor Swift.  Heaven can have all the born-agains, I'm heading south when I expire.

Kendall Jenner hot
Kendall Jenner dresses to shock in gown slashed to reveal her pelvic bones as she joins little sister Kylie at MuchMusic Awards
My Comment:  I bet if you yanked down hard on that flap, it would roll up like a window shade allowing easy access to Kendall's nether region. A dress both beautiful and practical.

Cersei is a punk chick Lena Headey tats
 Lena Headey wears unapologetic tank-top as she arrives at taping of Jimmy Kimmel show in Hollywood
My Comment:  It's a trap!

Because I got this exact comment through last week with respect to Jennifer Lopez and Lena does have a prominent Adam's apple/esophagus for a hot chick.

Then I thought maybe it was just a weird photo.

Cersei funny neck

Nope.  Girl has a pretty thick neck for a princess.  Then I got to thinking how Cersei would look with a Disney neck and Disney waist.

Cersei Disney version hot
Wow,  I can't draw anymore.  Bummer.

Khloe Kardashian pig mask oink
Khloe Kardashian dons animal mask and poses next to inflatable donut as she fools around 
My Comment:  What mask?   Belly up to the trough Khloe, that skirt can withstand a few more pounds.  Oink!

What mother would make her ugliest daughter that's kind of chubby wear a pig mask on TV?  Khloe's mother.

 Accepted Comments

Sometimes I do get a comment through the censors. Remember my goal is to get as many red arrows as possible.

Katherine Jenkins hot opera singer
Hats off to her! Katherine Jenkins highlights her slender figure in blue shift dress as she attends Royal Ascot Ladies' Day
My Comment:   She looks like a soulless party-goer in the Capitol from the Hunger Games.  Rating ▲1

Katherine Jenkins funny hat

Seriously, who's the parody and who's an actual upper-crust, elitist snob? 

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